A Daily Dose of Toni » A Daily Dose of Inspiration

I Lost “It” In A Tent And I’m Going To Tell My Kids

Toni — Mon, 14 May 2012 18:12:30 +0000

Obviously not today, my oldest is 12 so soon we will be having the dreaded discussions. I am lucky in the fact my boys are a bit on the immature side so I have been able to avoid some talk (minus the changes and all that jazz) thus far. My oldest will be 13 in exactly six months from tomorrow so the time is fast approaching that I am (or preferably my husband) will have to go into more detail about hormone issues outside of the body changes. It terrifies me because I have to face the fact my kids are, in fact, growing up.

Yes, yes I am one of those moms who holds on to the innocence as long as I can. Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny still live for all of them for goodness sakes. As I sat here today, I realized I might be holding myself in my own little delusional bubble and I am going to have to pop it sooner rather than later. I don’t want my kids to end up in the same situations I did and if that means grossing them out for a bit with some non-graphic details of my first time so be it.

I was much too young, at 15, to lose my virginity but it happened in a backyard, in a tent no less…..romantic I know. It wasn’t the most horrible thing that happened to me in life, so please don’t think that. I just want my kids to desire more for themselves when it comes to giving such a priceless gift to another. I want them to want more than a romantic rendezvous in a tent, in a backyard. If that means sharing my situation of giving of myself and whatever other examples, in a tactful way, so be it. I would rather be the example used than them be the example for themselves and do something that they can’t take back.

I am not a prude at all and I think S E X is a very beautiful thing, when it’s with the right person. I thought I was in love, of course, when it happened so that is why I can look back with little regrets (other than I didn’t save myself completely for my husband). I, however, want them to not look back at all. I want them to look forward and know that holding off is okay, that not listening to those screaming teen hormones is worth more than giving into them. That if you find the one you are going to marry in high school that’s wonderful but wait, don’t short yourself, experience life with no strings. Because with sex there are strings, even if they aren’t obvious.

The dreaded S talk is right around the corner and I will be using myself as an example because I want more for my kids than a tent. I want love, a life with no regrets and wholeness for them because if they are anything like me and they give themselves away to someone other than the person they marry they will have some emotional repairs (big or small) to do. It’s an emotional thing for me and considering they have my DNA I am assuming some of that got passed along. I want them to focus on the important things in life and while they are growing up and becoming the person they are going to be that’s what they need to focus on, not high school love and hormones.

I lost my virginity in a tent and I’m going to tell my kids about it, because I love them enough to want more for them than I had for myself. Have you had to had the S talk with your kids yet? How did you not freak out, because it seriously creeps the bejeebers out of me!

My Daughter Made Me Smile And It All Started With A Rainbow

Toni — Thu, 12 Apr 2012 22:13:02 +0000

Last week I was in the morning rush of getting kids out the door. I was frantic and frenzied as I am most mornings trying to rush the kiddos out the door. As we jumped in our van and pulled out of our driveway my daughter exclaims “MOM, IT’S A RAINBOW, A REAL LIVE RAINBOW“. I pause for a moment and say to her “Have you never seen a rainbow before?” and she responds with “Well only those in stories or coloring books“. I was simply in awe that this was the first time she had seen one and how excited she was. It’s the kind of excitement I want to have over things I don’t think to get excited over. An innocent and sweet excitement.

We continued our drive to school and as we pulled into the drop off lane we noticed it wasn’t just a rainbow but a double rainbow and she could barely contain her excitement. She says “Oh my goodness this is so pretty, they are just so so pretty“. To which I replied “You know God created the rainbow and the very first rainbow was a long , long time ago as a sign of a covenant, or deep committment, between us and God. He showed Noah a rainbow so Noah would know everything was going to be okay. Isn’t it pretty neat all the things God does“. She sat pondering this, and then in a raw and real moment she says to me “Mom, God is a really cool guy“

To which I replied “Yes He is sweet girl, yes He is“.

It’s moments like that in parenting that really trump every frustrating moment I have. Moments where I see the innocence and growth. The understanding and grasping something for the first time that make me be able to overlook the moments I feel like a failure and realize maybe, just maybe I am not doing such a bad job after all.

What are some moments that made you think “I am doing okay at this parenting thing”?

Christy Nockels’ “Into The Glorious” A CD Worth Having

Toni — Tue, 10 Apr 2012 19:19:17 +0000

I announced last week, the release of Into The Glorious by Christy Nockels. Today I want to share a little with you about one of the songs:

I have to say this whole album really touched me and allowed me some quiet moments with God. I love when I find an album that is perfect for me to worship to. Whether it’s during my prayer time or riding down the road it’s nice to just have a few moments of worship to the one who has brought me through so much. I think that is why Ever Lifting got to me is because it’s true, that’s what he does to me…ever lifts. Whether it’s to take me to a new level in Him or pull me out of a storm I can get out of. The whole album is just simply amazing but that song really ministered to me on a whole new level.

Check out Christy talking a little bit about Ever Lifting:

If you want to pick up Into The Glorious for yourself or someone you know that may need some uplifting songs you can on iTunes or Amazon. Don’t forget to keep up with Christy on her facebook and twitter (using #IntoTheGlorious) for the latest news.

Disclosure: This is a sponsored post as part of Christy Nockels: Into the Glorious Album Blog Tour in partnership with EMI Music and Momma Findings, however, the thoughts and opinions expressed here are clearly my own.

Christy Nockels “Into The Glorious” Releases Today (4/3/2012)

Toni — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 09:42:11 +0000

I have some wonderful characteristics, some that I am proud to have be a part of who I am. Unfortunately more often than not, in the past, waiting (or patience) was not a strong suit for me. Funny how God can change that in a life situation. Growing up I was a christian and I had faith but how strong was that faith? Looking back I realized just how little faith and patience I had. My how that changed in October 2010. My life was going just as I hoped it would. My family and I moved back to my home state of Florida, we bought our first house, and literally a week after signing the papers my husband lost his job. If ever there was a time of patience being a virtue for me this surely wasn’t going to be it…or was it?

As I sat stunned (and worried) it was in this moment God spoke to my heart, in such a loving way, to trust and wait on him. Trusting and waiting when you have no income with bills to pay isn’t the easiest thing but as I look back I see it really was. I was at a point in my life that was so out of my control I had no choice but to trust God completely. It was during that time I was waiting on Him and the promises he spoke to me, my faith was taken to a new level. So many things during that time got me through what was the biggest faith test of my adult life. I constantly spent time with God, I had music on and worshipped him throughout the day, I renewed my faith and waited on Him. Was it easy? No! There were times I wanted to just say “I can’t do this anymore” but He would comfort me and gently remind me to wait for and trust Him. So I did and he worked everything out so perfectly and in such a way there would never be a question of His faithfulness to me.

Have things been easy since then? Some days yes, some days no but I am always gently reminded of his faithfulness. There is a song titled “Waiting Here for You” and my how it is song that speaks right to my soul. It talks about faith moving mountains, coming to Him with expectations, praising Him and simply waiting on Him. It’s such a powerful song and one I play when I have moments of “wanting it now”. Waiting Here for You is part of Christy Nockels new album “Into The Glorious” which is out today. Over the next week I am really going to be soaking up the other songs on the album and give you a rundown of my experience with it as well as share a video from Christy. I have a feeling this cd will be played in my house on a regular basis if this song is any indication of how much I will enjoy it.

If you want to check out Christy Nockels new album here are a few links you will need:

Into The Glorious on iTunes
Into The Glorious on Amazon
Christy Nockels on facebook.
Christy Nockels on twitter. (#IntoTheGlorious)

Check back next week for my thoughts on the full album and go take a listen so you can let me know what you think as well.

I Heard This Song This Morning..

Toni — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 15:52:05 +0000

To say it mirrored my life is very close to true. If you changed the princess to a prince I would have sworn that song was written about my life. I was crying my eyeballs out driving down the road. It was called “Just Another Birthday” by Casting Crowns. Before I continue here is the song:

The song starts by talking about how she wished her father was there but it was just another birthday and she would be fine. I could not put into words how this mirrored most of my life and even wrote a letter to my dad in Dear Daddy. The girl in the song has her 16 birthday and once again her father isn’t there….I know that feeling more than I’d like to. But it’s just another birthday and she is going to be fine..right??

Next it talked about her being 19 and getting pregnant and that not working out the way she thought it would. Realizing he didn’t care. That was me too. Which now that I am older I realize that was a blessing in disguise but when you are 19, pregnant and alone it’s so scary. She has just another birthday but realizes she isn’t going to be fine

She calls out to God for healing, for Him to put the broken pieces together and be a father to the fatherless, meaning both her and her child. Finally she talks about being 21 and having her princess (in my case a little prince) by her side, looking back and seeing what all God has brought her through and realizing that it’s never again going to be “just another birthday”. God called her, held her, freed her and now she knows she (and her child) are going to be fine.

When I say that song brought me to tears I mean it really brought me to tears. I could not imagine there being a song more fitting for the life I had and the life I have. Do I still deal with the pain of not having my father active in my life…sure, but at the end of the moment of pain I know I am going to be fine. God has brought me through so much and blessed me with so much that never again will I look at it as “Just Another Birthday”

What about you, has there ever been a song that really touches you like that?

Faith Talk: Making It Through The Valley….You Will

Toni — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 16:34:02 +0000

As I sat reading my Bible and praying, God really began to lay on my heart a post to share. A post about making it through the storms, valley’s, hard times, or whatever you want to call them. As you recall at the end of 2010 and part of 2011, literally after we bought a house, my husband (or sole income provider) lost his job. That was such a scary time for use, probably one of the deepest valley’s I have ever had to walk through.

Life is going to bring you to valleys that are so deep you are wonder if you are going to make it to the top of that mountain you are trying to get to. Storms are going to come that are so forceful, you wonder if you will make it though unharmed. Hard times will be there and make you question your own strength and ability to go on. You will have tests, trials and tough times, but you WILL make it through.

We aren’t promised an easy road but making it through the hard times in our lives lets us look back and see the reason we had to go through that. I know it has for me. During the storms of my life I didn’t understand one bit of why I was going through what I was going through, but when I made it out I was a new and stronger person. I am by no means a pillar of strength but I am stronger in areas than before.

God wants us to take refuge in Him during the storms of life. He wants us to let Him be our safe place when the world around us is chaotic. He wants us to trust in Him when we don’t know what is going on. More often than not for me it’s because He was taking me to a new level in my faith. It would be so easy to be content but if your faith isn’t growing how can you be ready for all the blessings beyond what you could ask or think?

I really just want to encourage you today, if you are going through a valley (trial, storm, etc) to trust God to lead you through it. Sometimes going through the hardest times shapes us for what blessing is waiting. The valley’s lead to the mountaintops, the storms don’t last forever, hard times will end, but you have to remember the strength you have and let what you are going through build your faith to a new level. Don’t give up but push through, you are strong, you will make it through and your faith will be that much stronger because of it.

Are you going through something today that you just can’t imagine making it through? You will and I will be praying for you, because you are stronger than you give yourself credit for.

Where 2 Or More Agree. Prayer Requests & Praise Reports

Toni — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 12:40:20 +0000

It’s been a few months, I let this go to the wayside and I have missed it. With it being a new year I hope to do this EVERY Sunday from now on. It’s time for the “Where Two or More Agree” post. If this is your first time checking out this post, welcome. Want to know a little more about it, keep reading.

Each week on Sunday I am going to join in with those who want a little extra prayer for themselves, their family, loved ones, friends, anything they would like another person to stand with them in I am going to do that. I truly believe having others stand with you in agreement for whatever you are praying for put a little extra umpfh behind that prayer. For me it is comforting to know you have others standing in the gap with you.

You have the option of sharing your request, just your name or nothing at all when I post the next time and so I am going to share those that asked to have theirs shared so that you my readers can stand along with me and them. I also have a praise report to share as well.

Prayer Requests:

Anonymous: After four years of struggling to hold things together financially, we are going to lose our house. Please pray that we find somewhere to live and we’re okay.
Toni: For more opportunities to come to my blog, that God will work out a way for me to be able to get the conference I was asked to speak at. For God’s comfort.
Karen: For her mom who has Alzheimer’s and her son who has autism.

Praise Report:

Toni: Thanking God for good health and for opportunities brought to my blog so far..

So through out the week I will collect prayer requests through the form (or comments) and next Sunday I will post them all here. I will be agreeing with each of those who have asked for prayer. And praising God for the praise reports!! God will work wonders as always so let’s be expecting!

If you have a prayer request or praise report to share with just me or would like me to post please fill out the form below. Let me know if you would like your prayer request/praise report shared, just your name or nothing (as in being an unspoken name and need). I will only post those that want to haver their prayer request/praise report published. Please don’t hesitate to share one or both of those! It’s always good to have support in numbers!

Also if you want to after you have filled out the form and want people to start agreeing before I post next week feel free to leave it in the comment section as well so my readers can start praying before next Sunday! I am excited to see God work!!

Matthew 18:19 (Contemporary English Version)
I promise that when any two of you on earth agree about something you are praying for, my Father in heaven will do it for you.

Have a blessed day!

Where 2 Or More Agree. Prayer Requests & Praise Reports.

Toni — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 11:50:24 +0000

Prayer Requests:

Dawn: I will have to add my cousin to this. She is battling breast cancer. Her bone marrow transplant is also giving her issues. I think it’s trying to reject. So her and her kids are having a hard time.
Ana: We started our church last April and God is moving…bringing people to hear His message. Our prayer is that our congregation stays and through them GOD start using them to bring others to Christ. Also we are asking for musicians. Right now we have worship CD’s. But we would like to man and women to step out in faith to start playing for God’s kingdom. Thank you!
Joycet: Request special prayers for David in Texas who is in the hospital with ruptured colon. Pray also for his parents and all family members and the doctors and nurses in his care.
Anonymous: Baby Logan who has been diagnosed with Leukemia. Finances to improve
Donna: Unspoken request.
Toni: For more opportunities to come to my blog, that God will work out a way for me to be able to get the conference I was asked to speak at. For God’s comfort.

Praise Report:

Donna: I give God the praise for bringing a new job into my life. It came when very much needed! Thank you Lord!
Toni: Thanking God for good health, a speaking opportunity I was offered at a conference, the opportunities that God is bringing to my blog in 2012.

Matthew 18:19 (Contemporary English Version)
I promise that when any two of you on earth agree about something you are praying for, my Father in heaven will do it for you.

Have a blessed day!

For We Walk By Faith, Not By Sight (Guest Post)

Toni — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 10:07:13 +0000

2 Corinthians 5:7

That photo is Julie from Sober Julie and I am thrilled to have her guest posting here today. When she sent me a draft of the post I teared up reading her story and testimony. I hope it touches each of you just as much as it did me. ~Toni

For many years I walked through my life by sight not by faith, I was aware that God was always there waiting for me but I avoided Him and the life I was being called to lead.

When I was a young girl I had a close relationship with God, I knew I was loved, planned by God and Jesus was my best friend. He was a loving friend who cared for me deeply and I recall almost every night He was the last being I spoke to, feeling safe in his arms.

I was blessed to have a happy home with my Parents and sister growing up. I attended church throughout my childhood, until I was allowed the decision to attend or not and I chose not to. I didn’t feel a community feeling.

During high school I went to Florida with a Christian youth group, my primary purpose was to hit the Beach but instead I found God again in my life. I was RENEWED!! The Holy Spirit filled me with the Joy of knowing Christ again! I couldn’t wait to get home to share with my family and friends.

Once at home life took over again, I didn’t have a church to attend, nobody to attend with and quickly my priorities became success through education, money, status, friends and love.

Years later I had 2 college diplomas and was living a very fast successful life by my standards at the time. But there was an emptiness within me, a feeling something was missing.

Throughout these years there were many moments where God was speaking to me directly. In quiet times, times where I felt guilty, felt a pull in a direction I was resisting. I knew God was calling me but I just couldn’t face what I foresaw the life of a Christian woman to be.

I can’t remember all of the God winks in my life but I remember the shame well and the need to busy my life to ignore it.

God sent my husband to me when I was just finished my 2nd diploma and wasn’t looking for love. But God knew best, we fell in love, this was the first person I was totally honest with in my adult life.

We were married, bought a house, had 2 children and were very happy together.

But deep inside I was still feeling emptiness.

When my first daughter was 5 months old I went with my sister to hear a speaker who challenged me to consider having a relationship with Christ. Suddenly it became clear to me that it wasn’t a huge task to complete but a journey to live. God already knew me, what I had done and really did love and accept me!!

I was filled with His Joy again!!

And again I was weak to the challenges of daily living and my focus went back to my old idols.

I have always been an all or nothing person, living each area of my life separately, wife, mother, daughter, employee, party girl but this all came to a head when my Alcoholism began taking over my life. The emptiness within me was growing; my 2-3 glasses of wine had become 3-5 bottles on a Friday or Saturday night with anger, hostility, bad choices and blackouts.

Last February I woke from one of these drunken nights and felt the shame before opening my eyes. I was tired of living this empty life and had NO idea how to face life without alcohol.

I prayed, I prayed to the God who held me as a little girl, prayed to the Lord I felt in my teens in Florida, reached out to the hand of Jesus I had felt in my 30′s.

I was utterly defeated, humble, stripped of myself and prayed to God to use my life for His will alone.

I felt a calm fill me as silent tears streamed out of my unopened eyes. I felt His presence, strength holding me and the words BLIND FAITH resounded in my head.

From this moment I have been born again, been led to a 12-Step Program, been called to be very open about my alcoholism and my journey with God.

Coming out as a Christian wasn’t easy, it was SCARY. I had been a Soda Pop Christian before, all shaken and filled up then overtime became flat….I didn’t think this was the life I was being called to lead.

My entire perspective has changed, in my rebirth I’ve found purpose. Each day I give my life to God for His will. He knows I need him to be obvious with me and often is. I am accepting His Grace with action. So now I stand here, strong in my faith proclaiming loudly that Jesus Christ is my Saviour and for this I am humbled and grateful.

Where 2 Or More Agree. Prayer Requests & Praise Report, Share Yours Each Week

Toni — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 17:15:44 +0000

Prayer Requests:

This is where the prayer requests will go next week as I get them through this week

Praise Report:

Praise reports that people send in will go hear each Sunday.

FORM IS IN NEWEST POST

Matthew 18:19 (Contemporary English Version)
I promise that when any two of you on earth agree about something you are praying for, my Father in heaven will do it for you.

Have a blessed day!